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Vasaris, the Fuzzy Dragon
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March 2014
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Vasaris, the Fuzzy Dragon [userpic]
*blinks* *stares* *weeps for humanity*

Okdie-dokie pokies.

The instructions were pretty easy:
1. Go to Broker X and pick up stuff to take to Customs. Take it to Customs and get it signed off. Return to Broker X and give them the paperwork.

2. Be sure to get a copy for yourself while you're at it.

3. Fax your paperwork to Broker Y to set up your entry for Canadian customs.

4. Go through Canadian Customs.

I'm not sure where this became:

1. Go to broker X and pick up stuff for US Customs. Take it to US Customs and get it signed off. Return to Broker X and give them the paperwork.

2. Be sure to get a copy for yourself while you're at it.

3. Go to broker Z because you do not have an entry for Canadian Customs.

4. Give Broker Z your paperwork.

5. Have broker Z read your instructions, fail to comprehend that you are going back to Canada and call Broker X.

6. Have Broker Z continuously fail to understand "Is this the one with the cancelled bond? Yes/No? Is he coming south or going north? No, really, is this the driver I saw a couple of hours ago? Does he have paperwork A? Yes, I understand that Brokerage X is on there. We've done our part. No, we don't do northbound clearances in this office. Wait. What? No, what? Seriously, what direction is he going? He does have paperwork A. Yes? But you think he's going south, or something. Ma'am, please ask the driver which direction he's going. Seriously, why would he lie about which country he's trying to enter? Okay, hold on. I'll call our Canadian office. Give me your number."

7. Have Broker X go grab the faxed paperwork from earlier. Have Broker X read the instruction block that says "Fax your paperwork to Broker Y, 3 hours in advance, to 555-555-5555."

8. Broker X will proceed to boggle, frequently and with much confoozlation, because:

9. Broker X will call broker Z to make certain queries.

"Do you have these instructions?"/"Yes."

Small moue-frownyface.

"You see the part about faxing 555-555-5555."/"Oh, you did notice that."

Slightly raised eyebrows.

"You see the part above it about getting the paperwork?"/"Huh. You saw that, too."

Scrunched eyebrows. Smushed-wrinklenose. Pursed lipses of doomses.

"You weren't figure out who to call/fax because you're unsure if he knows which side of the border he's on, ore even which direction he's going. Because drivers are generally that clueless. Really. They rarely know where they're going. It's much more efficient that way."

Fingertips/bridge-of-nose OTP! Palms/Eyelids are, liek, BF forevar!!!

"Okie-dokie! So, you think maybe you should call/fax broker Y? Funny, I think that, too. I'm glad you found me helpful. Buh-bye."

Head/desk cagematch! Who will come out alive?!

10. And, also, what? 'Cause Broker X is not sure if ceiling cat is Laughing or licking his Holy Postierior and Furry Genetalia in our general direction (never forgetting the distributive property of "Holy" over conjunctions.)

I probably sounded like a raging dumbass, too, because I kept going "The dude with the TIB. The one I sent to customs. He's got the cancelled TIB, right? We're talking about the same dude, yes? Srsly, just to be sure, he's got the cancelled TIB, right? That's all we were supposed to do. No, really, that's it. Seriously, I have no idea what he needs to enter Canada. No, I really don't. I dont' do northbound brokerage. No. Seriously, I have no idea. What do you mean you think he's headed south? Does he have the cancelled paperwork or what? Which way does *he* think he's going. No, really, which way does he say he's going? But you think he's lying stupid confused and is supposed to be going into the US. But he has this cancelled US Customs paperwork and says he's heading north... Wait, haven't we had this conversation?"

Current Mood: amusedamused

and here i am feeling like cat crap because i'm on bedrest and unable to go to work until at least tuesday.

*passes her dear friend a very large very sharp peanut butter covered bat...*

Oh dear...someone give them a clue eh?


Love, Hugs n Kisses,