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Vasaris, the Fuzzy Dragon
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March 2014
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Vasaris, the Fuzzy Dragon [userpic]
De rerum fortitudio

I really need to practice my latin.

There are many ways for a person to be strong -- physically, emotionally, spiritually, intellectually... when it comes down to it, there's probably an infinite list of them. Some people bear pain like it was nothing, others have spirits that shine with wisdom. Some endure lives that drip misfortune in a way that would make a Chinese torturer proud, others bear up under events that would force Atlas to the ground.

Now me, I can't lift a car. I'm physically fairly strong, but without that amazing adrenal overdrive of doom, I'm not likely to shift a half-ton of metal, plastic, and volatile liquids.

I make no particular claims to emotional strength -- cowardice is more my thing. Making friends is hard, offering up true vulnerabilities? Not if I can help it. I've got immense respect for people who can do that, be it in personal relationships, on in wider veins -- offer themselves up without suspicion to ulterior motives, believing in the best of others.

But the kind of strength I am most impressed by, no matter who demonstrates it, is the strength to endure. sapphsmum (Christina, to those of us who know and love her) and shadowe (the former's story being quite public these days and latter's private, but she deserves this recognition) are two people I admire greatly for this trait. Christina's ability to hope, despite the day to day trials, despite the disappointments and despair leaves me in quiet awe. For every rant about the inadequacies and unfairness of it all, there is a line of hope, of belief and faith... and when it comes down to it, often when she rants it's not just about her -- it's about the system and how it is failing everyone in her kind of position. It's easy if you're under 18, or if you have small children, or are pregnant, or whatever to get help out of people. Endure a series of catastrophes as an adult with no children?

No one wants to hear your story. No one wants to help. After all, you were supposed to save up for it, right?

Few people in the US are prepared for what would happen if they needed a heart transplant, or had a rare form of cancer -- even with insurance. (I am told the film John Q, which I now wish I'd watched with mom (it was a couple of weeks before she died), has a fair amount of good information about this phenomenon. People assume that if they have insurance it will cover everything in terms of major medical. It isn't all that infrequent that it doesn't.)

As for my friend shadowe, her story is something I know RL and is private, but I can say this: the willingness to fight on, to keep getting up, to keep trying even in the face of seeming impossibility?

That takes more courage and strength than some of the alternatives. And it's the strength that will carry her though, no matter what the end result of current troubles may be.

The strength to make it to the far end of the tunnel, to push back the water rushing through the break in the dam, to know there is light above the darkness if only you can make it there... if there is one gift I could give everyone, it would be that.

There are, by my count, an infinite number of strengths to be had. Everyone can be strong enough to bear their burdens, to fight their fights, and endure what comes and enjoy the relief that awaits on the other side. Sometimes that strength needs augmentation (rebar is your friend!) and sometimes people have enough on their own without the aid.

I may not have a great deal of faith in the greater whole of humanity, I suppose, but... I do have faith in the strength of you.

Current Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful

*wiping silently shed tears away*

Thank you beloved friend...you have no idea how much your words mean to me...especially right now...I love you woman!


Namaste, Love, Hugs and Blessings,

*quietly struggling along...trying to be all I can despite the challenges life has thrown me recently

Hi There! Reading about you on vasaris' post you sound like a very kind caring person and I'd like to friend you if that is OK?

I read a few of your journal posts and I know you're going through a rough time. If you'd like a new friend just add me to your flists and I'll add you back.

Hugs, Christina

Befriending Shadowe

Yes please feel free to friend me...I shall add you as well...

Thank you...

Namaste, Love, Hugs and Blessings,

*who was slow to reply because things have been very difficult lately and I have not been able to get to LJ much with a Hawk watching me...*sad sighs*

Re: Befriending Shadowe

...geez. You free Sunday? We could get lunch or something. (I know, is usually a family day. I'll put my hands on your phone# and try calling.)

With the latest trip to Mayo and all that has been going on here I missed this post.

Jill, I am deeply humbled by this post. I go along everyday laying in bed thinking I'm not doing a thing to make this world a better place. I used to be a person who worked 18 to 20 hour days and did so much charity work that to be stopped in my tracks was more than I thought I could bear.

But my oldest daughter told me recently ,"maybe Mom you are doing what you are intended to do,and you could only do it when you stopped running night and day".

I didn't think so but to see posts like this it just makes me wonder if I am still touching others in a way I am truly not aware of, but still needed. I certainly hope so. It would make the daily pain and suffering worth it if I could believe I could still help one person in my life. I could bear any amount of pain knowing I was still making a positive impact on the world.

My dear sweet Jill you are much stronger than you give yourself credit for, and I wish we could talk on the phone. I feel you have been more a friend to me than I have been to you and for that I am sorry.

If you'd like to talk please email me at MiladyChristina @ gmail dot com. I'll give you my phone number so anytime you need a friend I'll be there. I promise!

Many hugs for caring so very much!